Doggy Toys:

Everybodyyyy, yeahhhh, rock your bodyyyy, yeahhhh, everybodyyyy rock your sparkle mouse top to the club and we will get it poppin and maybe I’ll wear those cute shoes with the buckle that you like and you can wear that jacket with the zippers on it that’s the same color and we can be like, woah look at us we totally match but not really and not on purpose this is such a happy accident because we are the closest of friends, in fact if I were a fox and you were a fox we would sleep in the same fox den together, if I were a ferret and you were a ferret we would sleep in the same hammock, if we were birds we would sleep in the same nest, if we were sharks we would swim next to each other while we slept with our eyes open and made sure the other one didn’t stop swimming and die, if i was a deer and you were a deer we would both lay in the same weird dent in some tall grass at night, if i were an ott-derp and you were an ott-derp we would hold hands while we fell asleep floating in the river to make sure we didn’t float away from each other, if i were a clown fish and you were a clown fish we would both sleep in the same sea anemone and make sure neither of us swam away and touched the butt in the middle of the night, if i were a prairie dog and you were a prairie dog we would both sleep in the same tunnel hole thing underground and wake up at the same time and poke our heads out of the hole and be like hey look at all this morning sunshine my friend isn’t this wonderful? And then we would agree on it and perhaps get some breakfast of bugs or whatever it is that prairie dogs eat and then giggle our little rodent giggles and chase each other through the field and be like, hey wait up I’m not that fast because I’m pretty out of shape and you would totally wait because you are such a wonderful friend you know? It would be like that except instead of animals we are made out of pasta and instead of doing things we are glued to a piece of paper and are actually just an art project that a first grader made and got a mediocre grade on it because it really wasn’t even that good, like we totally brought it home to mom and she was like, ohhhhhh it’s so great I love it! and hangs it on the fridge for like a week just to make us feel good but then it’s the first thing that gets thrown out when she starts getting rid of all the shit in the house. Just like that. Squiggle arms are squiggly look at those titties.

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Merchandise (dog toys, shirts and more):